I feel so behind in life

I don’t have anybody to talk to so I’m putting this here. My English is not that good and I’m terrible at explaining my feelings but if anyone reads it, thank you. I’m open to advice.

I’m 19 years old and I feel so stuck. I don’t go to university and I don’t have a job because I’ve been really struggling with my mental health. I don’t know if that’s a ridiculous excuse but it’s especially hard for me. I’ve had really bad anxiety and depression ever since I was a kid. I’m scared of people and I’m terrified of change, I tend to overthink about every little thing. I’ve never really had friends, and it’s been worse because I’m always home now. I’ve tried therapy and medication but nothing really works, but that’s probably my fault. I feel so behind in life and I don’t know what I’m going to do, I don’t even know what I truly want to do. It feels like I’m too late for anything. In my country, we have to take a university entrance exam so that also makes me really stressed, I don’t believe in myself at all. No one is pressuring me but it’s getting really embarrassing at this point, having to say that I don’t do anything when someone asks me. Can I really wait another year? I don’t know. I try not to think about it because I’m at a point where I get panic attacks if I think too much, but I know that nothing is going to change if I keep pushing it down. I hate that I’m like this, I do nothing but feel envy.