Just broke up with my boyfriend

TW: Abuse

Hi all so I just broke up with my first real love of 5 1/2 years and I’m still trying to get through my head that he was emotionally and mentally abusing me and Idk if this would qualify as physically but throwing things and being hit twice by the object (he says he wasn’t aiming for me idk if I believe that anymore)

He cheated on me twice in our relationship and I still stayed for years afterwards, please don’t ask me why, I genuinely don’t even know why I did myself. I went on a trip recently and I was hanging out with my sister and her husband and I just saw the way they treated each other, my sister wouldn’t flinch if he got loud (not yelling at anyone just talking in a friendly manner) or if he made any sudden movements. She wasn’t scared of him. He would stare at her and just tell her that he hopes their kids have her eyes because they’re so beautiful and kind. He loves to just be in her atmosphere and she loves being in his arms. They’re such a sweet and loving couple.

Then I saw how my uncle and aunts relationship is and honestly it’s absolutely beautiful, he’s so kind to her, he treats her like she hung the moon, she looks at him with such adoration and he looks at her like she’s everything to him. They were open and honest about their feelings all the time and communicated in such an in tune way that I’ve never seen before.

I took a few days to reflect and decided I need to really respect myself and truly love myself and leave this man. I didn’t even say anything really just “we’re done” and then I blocked him on all ways of possible communication. Then I kept it to myself for a few more days just to really come to terms with what I had just done.

On my way back with my sister (we were visiting her husband and our family) I told her everything for the first time and she looked at me in shock and horror. She is glad I left him and so are all of my friends, my mom, HIS MOM AND HIS SISTER.

His mom was so happy for me and she even said she had just asked him about me and he said I was great. She told me she knows that he hasn’t told her yet because she will just tell him because I’m too kind and I didn’t deserve the things he put me through. Like damn I cannot believe so many people were hoping I ended it. I just for some reason still feel like I did the wrong thing and I’m being dramatic, then again he led me to believe I was always dramatic when I reacted to things he did that I didn’t like.

I just need some words of support and encouragement please and thank you if you read all of this.