His inaction screwed up my life for months — what’s reasonable to expect from him now?

TLDR:

His procrastination trapped me in the country: missed a wedding + Christmas. What’s a reasonable level of compensation here?

My husband and I live in a country with brutal winters and extremely short days, and our immigration process is linked. Because he didn’t submit his part of the process on time — despite me reminding him for months, and asking him in every tone imaginable — we’re now stuck. I can still work, but I cannot leave the country at all until the government finishes processing our case.

That means:

I already missed a close friend’s wedding.

I missed Christmas with my family.

And I don’t know when I’ll be able to travel again so who knows what else I will be missing.

This has hit me really hard emotionally. Winters here already affect my mental health — the cold, the darkness, the isolation — but now the feeling of being trapped has made everything worse. It’s the loss of autonomy, the forced stillness, the sense that my life is paused because someone else didn’t act when needed.

He has apologized many times. But the truth is I don’t think he actually understands what he did. Not the scale of it. Not the emotional fallout. Not the way it’s affected my mental health. Not the resentment that comes from having your world shrink because of someone else’s inaction.

I pass my days with complete uncertainty and torn between deep sadness and anger.

So I’m trying to figure out:

Can something with this level of impact really be forgiven ?

What do meaningful consequences look like? I know marriage is not about punishing the other... but honestly believe that apologies are not gonna cut it.

What can he actually do to gain my forgiveness? I really love him and want to forgive him I just really can't.

How do you forgive when someone’s “mistake” cost you experiences you can’t get back?

I’m looking for perspective from people who’ve been in relationships where one partner’s inaction caused major, real-life consequences. What helped? What didn’t? And how did you decide whether it was fixable?