Anyone else feel like they have crippling existential anxiety/depression for no reason?

Long story short I (26M) took shrooms in August (third time ever tripping) and it caused me to stop bullshitting myself and accept the full weight of the fact that my entire life has been dictated by a neverending battle with existence itself.

I found this sub recently while ruminating and researching on what exactly it is that I’m going through. If you search “existential” in here, you’ll come across a million posts describing what I’m talking about.

Like others, I had a moment in my young life where my perception of reality was shattered. I was 9 and really contemplated death for the first time. I was so depressed for years on and off. I had almost nightly panic attacks thinking about death and the absurdity of existence. As I got into my early-mid teens, got into high school, became more independent and more of a person, this improved. The funny thing is I would still get these panic attacks thinking about death, but when they’d be over, I’d be awash with an opposite feeling of gratitude and oneness with the world. It told me “no, life is worth living.”

Anyway, it seems like many on this sub have similar experiences, but I’m troubled by the fact that everyone else’s seem to be informed by some family-related childhood trauma. I had a really nice childhood with near perfect parents and many friends. I’m scared by the fact that I don’t have the “excuse” of having lived through something terrible. Like I’m just broken and cursed to experience existence as torment sometimes.

Anyone have any similar experiences or thoughts to share?