i need some help here.

Okay so I've been assaulted by a man in his fifties. I'm 15. It has been a year since the "incident" but lately I've been missing him. Before everything he was a really fun guy. I'd go over to him for support bc my dad isn't around. So I saw him as a second dad.

He lives right across the street from me and I'd sneak over to his house which wasn't very hard. I have done that for about 2 years before he did it. I live on a very scummy street where drugs are getting sold. It's really bad and police drive by more times than I can count just in a day.

Anyways. I started to go back hoping things would change but my gut says I shouldn't be doing this. I feel bad bc my family got him thrown behind bars for what he did but I still go back. My mom doesn't know but I feel like she should.

I've googled if this is normal but I have no answers for it. Is it normal for victims to be attached to the person who assaulted them? Can I please get some support?