It feels like I'm in my worst year of peri as I've lost 3 close friends this year. I just had enough of their BS but feel really guilty / sad that it's all happened at once. I definitely feel crazy. Can anyone relate?

I've lost friendships before but never in my life have I ever had 3 close friendships end in the span of a few months (April - July). I have pretty intense suicidal ideation and had depression all my life so it all feels like alot. My marriage is also not in a good place. I was sad when I couldn't have kids but now a part of me is a bit thankful as I can't imagine feeling this way and having to take care of anyone else right now.

My cats are the only thing that makes me want to go on - sounds crazy but it's true.

I just don't really care about that many people at the moment but also feel sadness around this. There is nothing I look forward to these days except a day where I can lounge around in bed and watch tv or read.

Started HRT this week so praying it does something!