Please read it if you have a minute

Hi my name i Sahil 19M doing Btech in CSE , Today 9 december 2025 2.30 pm i finally made my mind to quite trading mainly options trading forever and for good , i will keep on investing when i will earn but no more gambling , i started investing 6 months back primarily in mutual funds it was around 6-7k i was saving it some money every month so that i could travel some palces with that but at that time it was hard time for MFs and my portfolio went down to 20-30% then i sold the funds and thought about trading as i was fascinated with the finance world and wanted to be a investment banker since i was a small kid thanks to those cool hollywood movies and series , so i started trading in august with 6-7k capital in first month i was negative around 300-400 rs so not a big amount , my brother already told me to not do trading at all because he was really good at it in his college time and he both earned and lost a lot of money in it , but i ignored his advice and did it i used to put the 13-15k my parents gave me for food and rent into my trading account slowly slowly unknowingly i became a addict i used to bunk classes for weeks to trade my freinds also laughed at me because i was all the time in my phone , i loosed some money but recoverd it in september but in october i started trading options tho i know every single one losses money in it and i was not a exception i lost around 32k which had my own 14-15k and that months allowance , My freind and my fwb saved my ass by giving me money for rent and food then i told all to my parents but they were still supportive about it because they know i want to get into this field after my engineering, i asked for a lakh from my father but he some how managed to give me 50k on a condition that i will stop trading after recovering my money , i made that 50k to 85k then back to 15k then back to 40k and then lost it all in a day but i was still clinging to my hope that i can’t lose , i thought even if i make 10k from 15k investment every month i will recover it in 9-10 month or a year at max but cut to today i am at home my parents gave me about 8k to pay my rent and give some money to my freinds , but today i lost around 3.5k from it and asked a freind for more money so that i can pay my rent atleast , my parents love me so much and i am thankful for that i am good at my studies and can surely make all that money in a day or a week after getting a job so i deleted the app now accepted that it was only a lesson no relapse trap and shit, i got a loving family my parents are happy as we are getting my fathers favourite car this weekend , i got an internship , its hard to accept the reality but you better do it quick because the loss always compounds and you get deeper into the hole even if i make that money again i don’t want to trade my peace for that money so this was all my rant , thanks if you read till here, and if anyone is going from same condition please reach out to your loved ones and quite this shit the money is not worth the Chaos . The only thing i would feel bad about is even after losing close to 60k at the time of diwali , my mom still gave me close to 10k to buy cloths but i gambled that too , but i will get through the guilt in a month or so now i feel more relaxed and focused towards my studies no more watching the screen for hours sleeping with a regret and headache :)