I can’t do “adult stuff”.

And I’m not talking about THAT adult stuff. I’m not good with managing my finances. I have a huge problem with making phone calls and many times I don’t understand what people want from me and they don’t understand even if I’m explaining to them what I mean. I’m undiagnosed, psychologist that I went to said that she sees no signs of autism in me. She meant “ticks, monotonous voice, obsessive over special interests”, which is really dumb of her in my opinion, because I wasn’t there to talk about my interests, I was there, because of domestic abuse on me, but whatever.

For example. Right now I’m going to a group therapy and the nurse said that she needs some stuff from me like a TIN for the job centre I’m going to. And I thought that it would be obvious, because there is only one in this city, and also usually they(any doctors really)send information straight to that place without even asking me about it. So I just acknowledged that she needs it and moved on. Few days later she again asks me about it. So I looked it up on my phone and I went to her office I was ready to tell her the number. She looked at me as if I was an idiot and said to me to write it on paper. She didn’t give me any paper. So I looked for a paper and there were only A4 format paper and I felt awkward writing it down on such a big piece of paper because it was only a number. So I wrote it down and went to her office again. Then she again gave me that look and said to sign it because how is she going to know it is mine. Ma’am u sitting in front of the computer.. and she didn’t hand me a pen even though it was in front of her. I had to ask. She gave me it I signed it and that was it.. I don’t get why she didn’t give me the instructions first. The whole thing was weird because I already told the doctor which job centre I go to.

Also I need to do a lot of stuff with these papers now. And I don’t know where to start and how to organise it so I don’t feel like it’s too overwhelming. So I’m just stuck in stressing over it and doing nothing because it feels like too much.

When I was still working my partner had some health problems and I was stressing over it and it was all I could thing about. I was calling him often to know if he’s ok, one day I even ask my boss if it would be ok if I didn’t go this day because my partner had like a 24h nosebleed(I’m not exaggerating, the intensity was various but it was constantly bleeding), she said “no” and I cried, and because of me crying a day later I had “THE TALK”, about what is more important to me. My work or my partner. I was like duhh my partner. And they looked at me as if I said something blasphemous. And they told me “so this work isn’t important to you?” And I truthfully(why would I lie I don’t get it) said that no it isn’t. I need it to make money but I wouldn’t cry if I didn’t have to work. Even more. I would prefer it that way if I could live without working it would really be less stressful.