What 2 years of deep depression did to me

Chronic fatigue. I feel so so tired and weak all the time.

Brain fog so bad it is even hard to read and comprehend stuff.

Insomnia. I have to take strong sedatives to sleep. I feel like death after waking up.

Developed bruxism in my sleep. Noticed it only after it fvcked up all my teeth and they started to hurt. The fact made my depression so much worse.

Anhedonia so bad I can't enjoy anything I did before. Zero reward from any activity. Watching a wall is as enjoyable as watching some good series. Can't game. I still make myself work out every day but I just feel more tired and more depressed afterwards.

Went through a laundry list of meds and only got worse. Anhedonia worsened a lot after "olanzapine augmentation", insomnia got a lot worse after trialing venlafaxine. Venlafaxine is probably the reason I developed bruxism.

Therapy for 2 years and it still seems like bs and complete waste of time.

Can't work anymore. The only reason I'm not homeless is because my parents started to support me. That in turn made my depression even worse.

All the hope that something will help is almost gone. How the fvck people exist like this for decades?