Advice

I’m really struggling and just need some outside perspective.

I’m thinking of ending things with my partner. I love them so much, and this decision is tearing me apart, but deep down I know we just aren’t compatible. I need communication, talking through feelings, and working through conflict. My partner is extremely avoidant. When there’s conflict, they shut down completely. It’s been like this for 6 years, and I’ve expressed over and over how much it hurts me and how unhappy it makes me feel.

A few days ago, I finally hit a breaking point. I woke up and just felt done. I told my partner I’d been thinking about breaking up and that I didn’t know what to do. They were visibly sad and said they understood, but didn’t say much else. I guess I was hoping for some kind of reassurance or small sign that maybe we could work through this.

Instead… nothing. We live together, and since that conversation, there’s been no effort to talk or check in. We haven’t officially broken up, but the silence feels like confirmation of everything I’ve been feeling.

I don’t know what to do. The silence is killing me, but I also don’t want to push since I started this conversation. I just feel stuck between loving them deeply and recognizing that maybe this really is the end — and if we were meant to be, it wouldn’t feel like this.