9 years ago the whole world came apart

TW * death suicide

9 years ago today I was bouncing around my livingroom putting the last few things on our Christmas tree. My phone rang, it was my best friend.

I answered the call and I heard the most anguished heart breaking cry rip from her throat. She couldn't get words out.

I kept asking her what was wrong and finally the most devastating words came out.

HE IS GONE, The police just called us D is gone he K*lied himself!

I just collapsed onto our couch and into my husband's lap trying to make sense of what she just said.

I knew that she and her husband were on thier way home from a trip, I couldn't even get to her the pain in her voice was like a hot knife in my heart, at the same time my heart was breaking for the "kid" I love.

He was an adult but not even 30 he had all these amazing things laid out before him. Tons of friends, funny , sweet, goofy, compassionate. You couldn't help but smile when he was around.

The next week I spent with my bestie and the rest of her family helping them hold things together while we planned his funeral.

So many people came they had to open the over flow room and it was still standing room only.

Nobody could understand why. His little sister was left without her brother, she now has a baby of her own named after him, who is missing out on the BEST uncle ever.

I've spent so many hours with his momma crying 😢 missing him. I've spent hours crying missing him on my own. His family has gone through so much from the pain of missing him.

I don't think he planned what he did that night, I think something happened and he made one terrible mistake. That leaves us all hurting and missing him forever always wonder what should have been.

So if you've read all my nonsense rambling thank you, but also if you need help please reach out, I promise you mean more, so very much more to people than you think.

• you may now return to your regular scheduled redit nonsense ❤️