I going to be an ugly man with boobs

All estrogen has done for me is mood swings and boobs. I will forever have to hide my chest or people will laugh at me for looking like a freak clown. I’m too ugly. I’m a wide shouldered browbone brickhon. But if I don’t wear a compression bra everyone will see my horrendous gyno. What do I do. Lmao i’d need top surgery if I ever decided to detransition, so my only option is to keep going and just be an ugly hon:))))))))))))