My dad was diagnosed with a terminal disease

If you were to ask me how I imagined my 20s going i don’t think I would have been anywhere in the ball park of my life currently.

My dad is dying of a terminal illness that is taking him, all the best parts of him, away from me slowly. My mom is a wreck, my sister is dealing with her own family troubles, my brother has been MIA since he graduated highschool (I honestly don’t even know if he’s gotten the news). My grandpa is also failing health wise. I have so much grief in my chest and I’m only 21. I cry myself to sleep almost every night but when people ask me how I am they don’t want to hear that. I’m so lost and I’m so angry and I miss my dad and the way he used to be.