AITA for cutting off my entire circle of friends because I hate 1 of them?
This one is gonna be long so bear with me.
So for a context, this circle of friends since college years which consists of smaller inside groups, let's call it group A and B. I mostly hang around group A ever since our first year in college (2014). Group B was later joined the circle around the time we graduated (2018).
When I was 2nd year in college (2015) I got close with one guy within group A, let's call him Blue. Me and Blue ended up dating for one and a half year and went through a messy breakup (2016). The reason for our breakup was because he groped me several times in different occasions during the time we dated but I only aware of it on that day. The moment I caught him in action was the day I broke up with him.
Another context: I was a heavy sleeper during my college years, my parents often said that I won't even wake up if there's an earthquake happening. That's why I wasn't aware of his behaviors before I caught him that day.
Based on his confession when I confronted him on later day, he mostly doing it when I was taking a nap at cafeteria after pulling an all nighter (I got a habit of being a night owl to finish assignments or study for tests) But at the day I caught him I happened I took a nap through a class instead in the cafeteria and wake up midway my sleeping time to a feeling of his hand slide into my shirt.
His justification when I asked him wtf did he just do? He said that he thought I enjoy it because I never protested before. Which drives me mad almost instantly and I ended up stormed off the class to a confused look from other students.
My friends in group A initially didn't know what happened that day that made me stormed of. But later that day they start asking me what did I do to Blue. I was confused of why they start questioning me like I was in the wrong. That was the worst day of my life and they treat me like I dumped Blue our of boredom. They said that Blue tried to end himself because I broke up with him. Since the day still feels like a haze to me, I didn't explain things to my friends in Group A and just sort of telling them Blue did something wrong that I can't disclose at that time. They thought me as a cruel person for some time but at that time I just didn't have the energy to explain things because I didn't want to ruin our group. I kept things to myself until group A was about to held a Christmas dinner couple of months later. I told one of my closest friend in group A, let's call her Red, that I would not attend the dinner for personal reason and Red assumed it was because of my breakup with Blue. But she was trying to convince me because after all I can just pay no attention to Blue and Red offeed to stay by my side so I can distract myself. I ended up attending the dinner but went home shaking as if seeing Blue made me relieved the incident where I caught him groping me. So after the dinner I told Red I won't attend anything with Blue in it. Red pushed for more info about my reason and finally I broke my silence and told her about the incident. She was very empathetic and assure me I'm safe with her.
That should be the end of it right, but it didn't. Fast forward to 2018 when group A got close to group B. And most of group B didn't know my ordeal with Blue so they kept inviting Blue when group A and B hanging out. It kept on happening and each time I always asking Red to please not invite Blue or not invite me if Blue was going. For some reason Red still treat Blue like he's just another friend and that frustrated me. So instead of lashing out I just cut off an entire circle because of Blue.
I know I acted out of pure emotion and after 7 years I witness all the high and low of my friends in group A only through social media, I wonder if I was overreacting by doing that. We were once very tight group of friends after all. AITA?
Posted Dec 11, 2025, 9:46 AM UTC