Made a huge mistake

The biggest mistake my life? It was thinking deserved love and happiness.. in any form. May it be from family or friends or whoever. I always thought ki itni buri to nahi hu ki kisi ko deserve na karu. But I was wrong. I dont really deserve people or any kind of happiness that comes my way in my life. And I've been reminded of that at every turn in my life. Im tired now. Cutting everyone off. And I've decided to live my life the way it was destined, alone. Anyone who came to my life? I've lost them at the very moment I thought they were permanent. And the people who are actually permanent? They keep proving that I dont deserve them and everything I've done to keep them was never enough. I've already quit all kinds of social media. I might delete reddit too.