🎬 Comic Title: “The Collection”

Panel 1: Gerald being led into a sterile-looking trailer.

“This doesn’t look like the rodeo. Why does it smell like latex and broken promises?”

Panel 2: A cheery vet tech holding a clipboard.

“Relax, Gerald. You’re about to make a lot of money, buddy.” Gerald’s internal monologue: “Every time someone says that, I lose a little more dignity.”

Panel 3: Close-up of the collection gear. Artificial vagina. Gloves. Labels like “PROVEN GENETICS.”

“Is that a rubber boot full of sadness?”

Panel 4: Gerald flailing, NOT into it.

“No dinner, no flirting, not even a Barry White track?”

Panel 5: Later, Gerald sulking in the corner of a pen with a juice box and oat cake.

“This was not how I imagined fatherhood.”