I really don't want to talk about my postpartum depression with my mom.

TW: Trauma dumping about PPD

So, my mom has weird opinions about medical stuff, and I've been on Zurzuvae for postpartum depression (Day 11 and it's still kind of up and down but better than before at least). She saw a post I made, or really, the comment on my BeReal photo, about finally taking a shower and texted me to ask if I had postpartum depression.

In my brain, I thought she knew already that I do. My mom lives on the other side of the country, but we text and we're in group chats with the family and I have multiple photos a day that I upload to a shared Dropbox so that she and other loved ones can see photos of my baby. She and Dad and my brother are visiting us for a day or two on Friday this week as part of their Christmas travels, and I sort of just want to wait till then to have any kind of conversation about how I'm doing, since honestly I'm not doing very well. But that's just if I'm being really really honest. Thankfully I can talk to my husband about it, we had a conversation a couple nights ago about just how bad it was, but anyway....

I just want to tell my mom in some roundabout way that doesn't hurt her feelings, "I do not want to have this conversation with you, I do not trust your medical opinions, and I do not want to argue with you about me being on a medication or about what I should be doing about therapy or whatever. I don't agree with you and I don't want to upset you. You're not the person I go to when I need support or encouragement, you're the person I try to keep happy and kind of talk to the least amount possible, if I have to be honest. But I really am sorry."

Saying anything even close to that would be so mean. I'm not going to do that. If it was an in-person conversation, and she were to ask if I have postpartum depression, I would probably just laugh it off and say "yeah, you know how it is, didn't you have it too?" Because for sure she did, there's no way she didn't. She and I have very similar mental health things, and I guess to me it just makes sense that she would have had it at least once with the three of us. I know that my grandma, her mom, did.

Anyway. I really don't want to talk about my postpartum depression with my mom. What do you guys think I should try to say? She's visiting on Friday and I just don't want to have a whole conversation... But I also don't really want to lie? I really don't know what to do. :(