Song of the Day Redux, Day 68: Carol Ann

Carol Ann

The next demo from the Afterman, this time from Descension.

The Content: A bitter and depressing song that sounds like it thematically links between Gravity’s Union and Dark Side of Me - like Homecoming, I think this is a song that was a contender for the mourning songs, but Iron Fist and Dark Side of Me ultimately won out.

I’ve read a bunch of theories on this song lately, many of them here in this subreddit. My favorite is that Carol Ann is actually the name of Meri Amory’s unborn daughter. Perhaps a baby name the Amorys had agreed upon despite being unable to conceive - or the name of a child they agreed to have after he got back, and before everything went wrong. There’s some evidence in the song to suggest that it’s about a child - “It’s a shame about Carol Ann and all she could have been.” That indicates unfulfilled potential. Also, “she’ll be forgotten.” What a terrible thought.

There are also theories that Carol Ann is a key entity idea that was cut. I don’t agree with this idea, because I think it’s a little too coincidental that Sirius encounter a spirit lost in a car accident before his experience back home. But it’s not a bad theory.

Someone here recently suggested that “mother did you see him coming, mother did you see him sneaking through the back door?” is Sirius reflecting to All-Mother about the cop that Meri ends up falling for. I like this interpretation, because it’s perhaps the only way “mother” makes sense in this story. It leads me to another theory, perhaps a bit tinfoily: this story was originally a lot darker (the song about the death of an unborn child notwithstanding.) And this song holds the key to an earlier draft from the story that had to be cut in order to lighten things up a bit. The line about “him sneaking through the back door” refers to a different suitor from the benevolent cop Colten. It refers to Dyer Grinlock, the date rapist that pursues Meri in Goodnight, Fair Lady. And suddenly, the lullaby chimes at the end of that song make a lot more sense. In an early draft of the tale, I’m almost certain that Colten didn’t exist. I’m glad he’s written in, but if this is true, this song becomes a whole lot more depressing than it already is.

The Music: What starts out with a somber chord plucking from Claudio transforms into a dynamic and angry song that could have perhaps rivaled some of the band’s most emotional tracks, and with some of the most chilling vocals Claudio has ever sung: “Through the walls of your heart, I will tear you apart.” I truly wish we’d gotten this as an album track, or at least a fully produced song, rather than a demo. As it is, this is perhaps my favorite track on Descension. To me, the emotion behind this song cuts through stronger than anything else on the album, including Gravity’s Union. I know that’ll be a controversial opinion, especially from someone who took his username from the Sentry demo back when Claudio first released it a whole year before Descension came out. But I’ll stand by it.

The Part: 3:49: “Don’t turn the page, love, its words don’t hold your fate.” Or perhaps 4:36 - the way Claudio extends “walls” with the last of his breath. Such powerful emotion, and I love how breathy it is - it’s pure and raw Claudio.

These are the words for my Carol Ann
The girl I broke in half.
Oh I'm afraid there's nothing left 
No pieces to put back in place.
I was a monster, the things that I did
I regret, I dismiss.

Oh it's a shame about Carol Ann
And all she could have been.
She soared with such grace
As her body sailed through the windshield
From the passenger seat
I was a monster, through neglect I replaced
Her love for these lonely days

Oh she'll be forgotten
Oh she'll be forgotten

Young hearts beat on
To a love that everybody wants.
But we can't have it all 
So we take what little we can

Oh mother did you see him coming
Did you see him?
Mother did you see him sneaking
Through the back door?
Still in the time we wish we spent but lost it all
Oh oh
Oh oh
the time we wish we spent but lost it all
Oh oh
Oh oh
the time we wish we spent but lost it all
mother did you see him coming
Did you see him?
Mother did you see him sneaking
Through the back door?
This time we'll reinforce the wall

Don't turn the page love
It's words don't hold your fate
The suit will become one
And from their world you will escape

Through the walls of your heart
I will tear you apart
Through the walls of your heart
I will tear you apart
Through the walls

Next up: Random Reality Shifts