[The True Confessions of a Nine-Tailed Fox] - Chapter 229 - Wits versus Willow Leaves
Blurb: After Piri the nine-tailed fox follows an order from Heaven to destroy a dynasty, she finds herself on trial in Heaven for that very act. Executed by the gods for the “crime,” she is cast into the cycle of reincarnation, starting at the very bottom – as a worm. While she slowly accumulates positive karma and earns reincarnation as higher life forms, she also has to navigate inflexible clerks, bureaucratic corruption, and the whims of the gods themselves. Will Piri ever reincarnate as a fox again? And once she does, will she be content to stay one?
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Chapter 229: Wits versus Willow Leaves
The Goddess of Life’s laughter burst out like a gale in the Jade Mountains, so strong that it flattened my ears against my skull. I gritted my teeth, set my paws, and waited it out.
When it ended, in the split second when the shape of her mouth was still transitioning to speech, I jumped in. Tell me, Director of Human Lives: What is the punishment for illegally seizing another bureau’s clerk?
If she could have stabbed me or stopped my heart or stripped my soul out of my body with her gaze alone, she would have.
Standing over Aurelia’s prone form, Cassius snapped, “There was no illegal seizure. I am the Assistant Director of Reincarnation. This is my clerk. He falls under my jurisdiction.”
The Goddess of Life redirected her glare at him, but too late. He’d given me the opening I needed. Oh, Cassius, always so easy to bait!
So you acknowledge that you are the ASSISTANT Director of Reincarnation? That you fall under the jurisdiction of the DIRECTOR of Reincarnation?
He couldn’t say no, not in front of a goddess who was a Director herself and jealous of the prerogatives thereof. But if he said yes….
Cassius’ fists clenched and unclenched. “I am, of course, loyal to my true Director.”
Are you? And what, pray tell, is a “true” Director?
“A TRUE Director is one who has been interviewed, vetted, and confirmed by the Committee of Directors and Assistant Directors after a long and thorough process.”
Oh? I pricked my ears at him. And the seals have nothing to do with it?
“The – the – the seals embody the authority of the Directors. Under the Code of Heaven, Whosoever holdeth the Seal of a Bureau isthe Director thereof….” It was Shimmer who spoke up. Look at him, growing a spine in defense of the law! Maybe the sight of Flicker’s mangled starlight had jolted him into the realization that his boss could murder him whenever she wanted. “The…the Committee of Directors and Assistant Directors exists to determine who receives the seals, but it is the seals themselves that confer – ”
“Silence! I did not give you permission to speak, clerk.” The Goddess of Life flicked her willow branch.
I leaped off Shimmer’s back just in the nick of time. Everywhere willow water touched his skin, it hissed and peeled away and starlight streamed out. Shimmer screamed and smashed his forehead against the floor, babbling apologies.
How were the guards, who were presumably sworn to uphold the Code of Heaven, taking this? I glanced at them, but their faces were hard, unmoved – and entirely unsurprised. I supposed witnessing the gods abuse their power was as natural as eating or drinking.
The oystragon gulped, then stepped forward to hover by me, ready to shield me or snatch me out of the way of any more willow water.
“That,” said a hoarse, cracked voice I barely recognized, “was an attack on a Director.”
Forgotten by everyone, Aurelia had succeeded in scraping the willow leaves and starlight off her head. She wiggled into a sitting position, still cocooned from the shoulders down. Her necklace of seals winked between her bonds, announcing to all present that under the Code of Heaven, she, too,was a Director.
I grinned at her. Not just one Director. Two. They have now attacked two Directors. Guards! Free the Director of the Sky and Academia!
“Guards!” snapped the Goddess of Life. “End this farce! Arrest these traitors at once!”
Caught between so many people bearing legitimate seals of office, the guards wavered. Outside the Bureau of Human Lives, my authority as the only Director in sight had been clear, but who outranked whom here? Which bureau had the most power? The Bureau of Human Lives, in whose domain we currently were? The Bureau of the Sky, which oversaw the grounds of Heaven? The Bureau of Academia, which held the accumulated knowledge of the world? The Bureau of Reincarnation, which controlled the existence of anyone who died? Until recently, I’d have said that Human Lives ranked lowest out of these four, but control of Temple offerings had obviously boosted its wealth and prestige.
Well, when rank wasn’t clear, numbers would carry the day. Guards! By the authority of the Directors of Reincarnation, Academia, and the Sky, we command you to defend us!
Aurelia’s eyebrows arched, silently asking, What happened to the seal of the Ministry of Wealth?
Later, I mouthed.
Armed with the authority of three Bureaus, the guards tramped forward. Cassius slashed his hand through the air, and starlight hurled them back.
“Arrest the Star of Heavenly Joy!” ordered Aurelia. “An Assistant Director has dared raise his hand against those executing his own Director’s order!”
Swords drawn, the guards formed up into a loose, wary ring around Cassius. “Star of Heavenly Joy,” said their captain, “you are under arrest for defying your Director. Please stand down.”
“My Director? What a joke!”
Cassius flung up his palm. Light blasted the captain across the room. He smashed into a shelf of jade figurines and porcelain vases, shattering them and crumpling to the floor.
In the same instant, in a move worthy of a village wrestler, Aurelia threw her upper body into Cassius’ shins. Huh. I never would have expected such a move from the always-elegant former empress – and neither, apparently, did Cassius. Backwards he toppled, in a tangle of robes and kicking feet. The lanternfly guards piled onto him while Aurelia rolled out of the way, shedding leaves and starlight as she went.
Focused on the ex-spouses’ drama, I’d taken my eyes off the Goddess of Life. A thousand invisible willow leaves sliced into me from all sides. I howled and rolled, leaving bloody red streaks all over the floor.
“Director! Director! What’s happening?” cried the oystragon, whipping his head around as he tried to pinpoint the source of the attack.
Goddess – of – Life, I choked out.
He snarled and threw himself at her, only to slam into the floor when her eyes shifted from me to him. Green blood welled up from long slices that opened up all over his body, cutting through his scales as if they were thin skin. Growling, he struggled back to his feet and staggered towards her, hands outstretched.
The Goddess of Life batted at the air as if she were shooing away a swarm of flies. While the oystragon distracted her with his illusions, I crawled towards Flicker. His robes hadn’t so much as twitched since we entered the room, but surely his body was still there under them, right? He couldn’t be gone. That mist of starlight couldn’t be all that was left of him….
I nudged aside his robes with my nose and nearly collapsed when I saw his chest. His body had deflated when the Goddess of Life ripped the starlight out of him – but it was still there. His starlight clung to his skin, swirling as it searched for a way back in.
“Oh no, oh no.” Shimmer appeared next to me. The other star sprite patted Flicker’s chest gently, as if testing how empty he was.
What? How is he? Will he be okay?
“I don’t know…. I’ve never seen anyone lose so much starlight…but in theory, if he reabsorbs it all, he should be okay….”
The starlight pulsed, as if in agreement.
How do we get it back into him?
“I don’t know…I don’t know…. I think it just takes time…”
A crash. The Goddess of Life shoved back her chair so hard that it cracked against the wall. With a flick of her willow branch, she tossed the oystragon aside. He slammed into the far wall, tearing through a painting that hung there. (“The first human scroll painting!” moaned Shimmer.) A wave of willow leaf blades shot after him.
A blast of golden light. They plinked harmlessly to the floor. On her feet at last, Aurelia backed up towards us, both hands up and ready to shield us. “Hurry! Get him out of here!”
Get Flicker out now, I ordered Shimmer. Take him – where could they go? Where could they find sanctuary? – Take him to the Bureau of Reincarnation.
Yes, that was the safest place for them right now. Glitter would defend her Bureau alongside all the other clerks, Accountants, guards, and imps who had sworn themselves to True Change.
“Yes, Director.” Shimmer eased his hands under Flicker’s back, lifting him like a piece of antique lace that might disintegrate at any moment.
“Oh no, you don’t. Lock!” At a single word from the Goddess of Life, her office door slammed shut.
Shimmer bundled Flicker over his shoulder and tugged on the handle. It didn’t budge. He thrust his key into the lock, but it wouldn’t turn. Gasping, he threw his whole body into the effort, straining futilely against his Director’s power.
“It won’t open, it won’t open. We’re trapped…. Oh no, we’re trapped….”
Did the seals grant me any special powers?
Open! I commanded the door.
Nothing.
By the authority of the Director of Reincarnation, I order you to open!
Still nothing, although one of the guards who were attempting to arrest Cassius did sail through the air, flung by the god’s power. He somersaulted, hit the door feet first, and dove back into the fray. Although the lanternfly guards couldn’t match a star god in individual power, they could swarm him, and each time he flung one off, two more jumped on him.
Aurelia! Do something!
“Get away from the door!” she yelled. Shimmer scuttled sideways, and a bar of white-hot light vaporized the wood. “Go!”
Shimmer scurried out, trailing Flicker’s starlight like a veil, and Aurelia retreated towards the doorway, palms up against the Goddess of Life. “Hurry, hurry! We’ve got to get out now!”
Groaning, the oystragon crawled out the door, leaving a trail of green blood behind him. I limped after him. My paws slipped and skidded in my own red blood. It flowed from cuts all over my body, matting my beautiful fur. Even the once-creamy tip of my tail was red. Ugh, I hoped the imp janitors had a special fur cleanser, otherwise I was never getting all the bloodstains out!
“No.” The Goddess of Life’s cold word rang out around the room. A basket woven from willow branches fell over me.
I flung myself against its sides and bit and clawed. The basket simply deformed under my assault and then sprang back into shape.
“No!” I heard Aurelia cry. Light blazed through the cracks between the branches, and smoke choked the air.
Aurelia! Aurelia! What’s going on? Are you all right?
“I – am – fine!” Another burst of light, and then I felt her throw herself at the basket. “I can’t lift it – ”
She screamed. Hard objects thudded against the basket and plinked to the floor. More willow leaf blades. Her fingernails rasped as she tried and failed to rip the branches apart.
“Oh no, oh no, oh no. Piri, I can’t get you out!”
Another burst of willow leaf blades. She screamed again.
The tramp of many boots vibrated the floor. “Heavenly Lady!” called the guard captain. “We have arrested – the Star of – Heavenly Joy! But he won’t – stay – arrested!” He grunted as if Cassius had kicked or elbowed him.
Aurelia hesitated, torn between rescuing me and helping the guards subdue Cassius. But we couldn’t afford to let him get free, not when we finally had him.
Go! Get him to prison!
“But you – ”
Protect Flicker! And the others! I’ll be fine!
Aurelia wavered only a moment longer. Then her glow withdrew from the basket, and her brisk footsteps marched towards Cassius and the guards. “Come on, Cassius.”
I couldn’t see what she did, but he yelped, and then there was the sound of something being dragged out the doorway. Their footsteps faded away, leaving me alone with the Goddess of Life.
The basket vanished. Willow leaves whipped around me, binding me and lifting me into the air with my tail dangling out. I thrashed, but it did absolutely nothing. If it had taken Aurelia, a star goddess, so long to break free of her bonds, then what hope did a mortal fox have?
You are in violation of the Code of Heaven, I gasped*. You will be punished for kidnapping and torturing another Director.*
The Goddess of Life reclined in her chair, purposely highlighting the difference between her and the flailing ball of leaves and fur. “We had a deal, Flos Piri. I would defer your punishment only until you reunified the Serican Empire. As I see it, I am simply fulfilling the terms of our bargain.”
The bargain Flicker had agreed to on my behalf after she shredded me the last time I visited her office. I groped for some loophole, some way out. Are you so sure the other Directors will see it your way?
Her cold, dark eyes bored into mine. “For you, Flos Piri, they would make any number of exceptions.”
Even ones that set a dangerous precedence for themselves?
I knew I was right when her lips pressed into a thin line. “No amount of political hairsplitting will save you now. Let’s execute the terms of our bargain, shall we?”
She clenched her fingers, and the willow leaves crushed my body to pulp.
A/N: Thanks to my awesome Patreon backers, Autocharth, BananaBobert, Celia, Charlotte, Ed, Elddir Mot, Flaringhorizon, Fuzzycakes, Just a Kerbal, Kimani, Lindsey, Michael, TheLunaticCo, and Anonymous!
Posted Dec 26, 2025, 2:45 PM UTC