Learning to accept I'm too much.

What if the 31st is the last day of my life? No more taking up space. No more being the burden I feel like I’ve become. I tell myself everyone would be better off without me and that thought hurts more than I know how to explain. Still there’s a strange quiet peace in believing they’d be okay that they’d move on breathe easier live lighter lives without the weight of me all I’ve ever wanted is for the people I love to be happy even if that happiness exists in a world where I’m no longer here some days it feels like my absence would finally give them the relief I never could.