I'm sick of my mom being drunk all the time

She's not abusive in any way, she's just emotionally taxing to be around when she's drunk. She's overstimulating, volatile, and, for a lack of a kinder word, a little obnoxious. I hate being around her and that sucks because I genuinely do love my mom. When she's sober, she's my go-to for basically anything, whether it be emotional support or just wanting to hang out. She's the most amazing person I know so it makes it that much more draining when she's just... not.

It especially sucks knowing she drinks because of her depression. We all have it, everyone in our family, but she's the only one who deals with it through alcohol. It hurts my heart to know she's hurting and I can't do anything about it. I've suggested therapy, and she's agreed that she needs it, but the conversation never goes past that point no matter how much I push.

Tonight kind of broke things. She was drunk, she was stressing me out, and I kind of shut down. Bad. I remember practically rushing downstairs while she asked me what was wrong and all I could respond with was "I'm done for today." She called me back up later to demand answers and I broke down about it for the first time. I'll admit, in the moment I used words that hurt and I regret that, but I couldn't back out. When I told her I hate being around her when she's drunk, she threw her hands up, stormed in the other direction, and said "I'm not even that bad," to which I responded "you don't think you are."

Later, she texted me saying she's not even drunk and doesn't understand why I thought she was. I don't know if she thinks I'm stupid, but I know exactly when she's drunk. Not only does she act completely different, but she's smelled like alcohol since 3:30. Now she's upset at me and I don't even wanna leave my room til morning. I'm just so tired of this.