Need perspectives from people who “get” it

Background: diagnosed with autism, hEDS, POTS, Hashimoto’s, Sjogren’s, Raynaud’s, probable ME/CFS. So, I’m supposed to go to my cousin’s wedding this weekend. It would be a 10ish hour drive Friday, wedding Saturday, 10ish hour drive home Sunday, and back to work Monday. My husband can’t drive and my dad has been having health issues that make me nervous about him driving such a long way. I don’t trust myself to drive such a long way either (I’ve only ever done 3 hour stints). I already feel myself flaring up due to the Christmas activities, which wasn’t even that much. I feel like I have the flu (typical for my PEM crashes). I really want to see family, especially my grandma who isn’t doing too well, but I don’t feel safe getting there or back. Not to mention it’s flu season. Flying is out of the question as it’s expensive and I have thousands of dollars in medical bills I need to pay. Unfortunately my mom (who is flying there) is really upset with me for not wanting to go. Would you suck it up and go anyway?