I don’t think a lot of people actually have “being a good person” as a pillar of their ego.

I used to not even consider this. When I first accepted it, it made me depressed and reclusive, demonizing of ALL other people. Today, it’s a bit more freeing to accept. Since 2023 i have been unlearning people pleasing tendencies. I understand that we all have different moral compasses. But something deeply instilled into me was the idea of being good, adhering to one’s own (instilled) moral compass, ESPECIALLY when others didn’t watch. I now understand that it is ignorant to assume everyone or even most people are as loyal to this ideal. I think of all the times someone said “you’re too nice” in a “you poor thing, you just don’t get it” kind of way throughout my life and it’s got me wondering.

I spent the first two decades of my life sort of held back by belief that most others had good intentions and denying myself privileges granted to me out of favorism/rapport, attractiveness etc.

I now understand that I can turn people pleasing into a strength now that I better understand what made me be that way + I don’t have to police myself before others get to if I am reaping the benefits of my labors in the social economy (lol)