VENT/ADVIDE: The unknown limbo period is killing me (TW: positive test, mention possible MC, bleeding)

Got my first ever positive test result on Thursday, Christmas Day after 14 months of trying. I have shorter cycles (23-24days) so I was 3 weeks when I tested positive and I know it was early but I was so excited!

The next morning , Friday, I woke up with a gush of bright red blood. Not enough to soak a pad. No tissue in it, but some very very small black specks. No cramping or pain. It cleared up in 24 hours. Went to get blood drawn and my HCG was 115, which is in normal range for 3 weeks, but higher. (Normal range is 5-50)

Two days later my HCG only rose to 119 and I went to the ER to get evaluated. HCG was up to 131 by the end of the day.

Dr said there was no reason to believe its ectopic yet (no pain) and because my HCG levels are slowly rising, he can't rule out if I had MC or if this is just an abnormal HCG progression. After all, it was pretty high for 3 weeks (5-50 is normal). Basically I was sent home to have my OB just keep running labs and monitoring my health.

I've accepted that this could very well be a MC but I'm still holding out for hope that this is one of those rare freak incidents that I've read about from other moms.

Getting my HCG tested again tomorrow morning and I'm praying it either jumps or drops. I can't keep living in this space of not knowing.

Was just looking to vent but I'm open to hearing stories of folks who may have had similar situations happen.