anyone else feel displaced after losing a parent?

After I (18) lost my mom, my dad moved in with me & my brother (16). They were only divorced but still active in each other’s lives.

My dad has completely shifted the dynamic. My brother is closer with my dad and I was closer with my mom. It just always feels so isolating, like they still have each other but I don’t really have anyone. My dad isn’t abusive or anything. He’s incredibly nice and loves me but I just don’t feel like I fit in anymore. They always talk about football and sports and guy stuff and bond over TV shows that are extremely gorey with guns and heavy violence.

But my mom and I liked everything pink and shopping, getting our nails done, watching reality TV, reading books that made you think, gossiping about family members and giving each other genuine advice and daily calls while I was away at university.

Idk if i’m even looking for a solution, only thing i’d want is my mom back and for the house to be filled with giggles and pretty decor instead of farts, burps, screaming at the tv and the lack of taste furniture that my dad brought to the house when he moved out of his apartment.

Has anyone else experienced such a thing? Am I just being sensitive and selfish?