How long did it take for you to realize you were the weird kid no one talked to in school?

It took starting homeschool in 9th grade, and then graduating 3 years later for me to realize it. I always thought I was invisible at school. There were other kids that I saw as the weird kids no one talked to. I just never realized I was one of them. I couldn’t understand why no one would ask me to be friends. I actually thought it was how I looked, that I was ugly, and ended up super insecure. I’m still uncomfortable looking in mirrors to this day.

There was this one time we had finished a spelling test. The teacher had us swap tests with each other so we could grade them. Everyone did that, but no one switched with me. I pointed it out and then tried to just switch it with the girl next to me. She said “No” in the most grossed out, disgusted tone and switched them back. Then she tried to switch mine with someone else’s so I was like it’s fine, I’ll grade my own. I wasn’t a trouble maker so it’s not like I would cheat and change my answers. The way she said “No” always stuck with me though. As if I had cooties, or something. I wasn’t gross. My hygiene was at its best when I was in public school.