What can I do to help my disabled partner?

For some context, we do not live together, they're about 40min away and usually drive into town to see me during my weekends. They have EDS, autism, and some other unexplained pain problems.

Since they usually come over I don't see there house all that often. Their room has gotten incredibly messy before and I've come over to help some in the past. Usually it's piled up boxes and lots of dirty laundry and I can help with a lot of it. This time I was over for Christmas and saw their room for the first time in a while and it's by far the worst it's been, empty boxes in a pile as tall as me, a good 4 inches of stuff on the ground with no path, every surface layered with boxes and clothes and the closet hardly accessible. They have a desk that I truly could not see.

I say all of this not because I'm judging them but because I'm deeply concerned. I don't even know where to begin helping with this. I'm not disabled myself but I certainly don't have the bandwidth to tackle it on my own especially with my limited time due to work. They refuse to ask anyone else for help despite some of their friends absolutely being willing to because they're ashamed of it. What's worse is they have cats that largely start in their room due to there being dogs in the rest of the house that, while not violent, scare the cats and their room is truly just not a good place for anything to live other than the mice that have infested their house.

I want to directly ask their friends but I know they'd be pissed at me for it and likely have a meltdown. Even just trying to bring it up to them they start to shut down.

I know this is having an effect on their health. Their sleep is horrible, they're already not very balanced so having no flat ground and weak ankles is a recipe for disaster, etc. They are not living in there, they are surviving and just barley.

I've helped them a lot over the years but I'm not professional at this and I just feel so lost on what my next steps could be to help them.