60 Day Chip

I’m getting my 60 day chip tonight (yay!). I can’t believe I actually have made it this long. In the beginning I was on the pink cloud; I was thinking this is easy! I’ll have no problem.. well then came 30 days, 45 days, 50 days and shit got harder. Drinking dreams started, cravings hit hard when something happened (it was my main coping skill), and I started realizing the really really bad decisions I made when I was drinking. The things I said and did? Wow. I can’t believe my friends are still friends with me. Don’t worry, we are all on good terms now! Here’s what on my mind regarding my 60 day. I’ve done a lot of self reflection, apologizing, therapy, and genuinely trying to become a healthier person mentally. Im working on my relationships with others becoming healthier and more fulfilling on both sides. Friends, family and my sponsor has seen my growth over the short period. Like I said I never thought I would make it to 60 days, and I asked my friends if they would come to the meeting tonight to see me get my chip! I was extremely hopeful that they would, they’ve provided so much support, more than my family, and they know how proud/excited I am of myself. These friends are my family members that I chose, and that they chose me to be apart of theirs. Anyway, I asked if they would attend and they all said no. I know/understand it’s not everyone’s scene and they may be embarrassed to see someone they know there. But it’s birthday night, a lot of friends and families attend. I’m so disappointed, heartbroken, and hurt. One friend said just straight up no. Another said, her husband doesn’t know how to take care of the kids like she does. One never responded. Another never responded. I really thought they would. I wanted to share this with them; if it wasn’t for them I wouldn’t be in AA. I would still be destroying my life, and the others who crossed paths with me. I was like a tornado in my life, my friend’s lives, my family lives. Am I crazy to even think that they would? Am I being dramatic/over processing this? Do I have the right to feel hurt and disappointed? After all, I caused a lot of hurt and pain. My sponsor will be there and my AA friends, so I have support from them, but it’s not the same. Any advice? Similar stories? Or whatever? I don’t want to keep wallowing in self pity. Also-sorry if it doesn’t make sense! I’m BAD at story telling and voicing my feelings, I’m all over the board 😂