I feel trapped in my marriage

It’s not that he’s a bad person and we both care for each other. We say ‘I love you’ to each other but I don’t think I do anymore or even if I ever did at all. We’ve had some great times together. We met 20 years ago and I am now 71. He is 61.

He can be funny, kind, attentive, boyish charm and very easy to get along with as long as we agree. We share the domestics, no issues there either. I trust him 100% and know that he would never be unfaithful.

So it seems life should be perfect, but it’s not.

He works hard but money is always very tight and I’ve had to bail him out more than once. I think he does lie… lots of little things and makes me feel like the fool and the problem. He’s quite self-indulgent as although he cares for others he puts his needs and daily agenda first. Which is mostly okay as I’ve got used to that.

I do feel used and seriously thinking of pulling back, both physically, emotionally and financially and gradually extricating myself from this marriage gradually.

I need the strength to start 2026 with confidence to free myself.

Do you think I’m overreacting and this is life, or how can I escape?