I have officially decided I don't care what my boyfriend says, I'm fucking all the older guys I can

1(29F) and in a relationship(34M) to a man who keeps entertaining the IDEA of being in an open relationship. He will talk up a big game saying he's in an open relationship and can fuck any bitch he wants. But, any time what I want is brought up he becomes defensive, insecure, moody, and sometimes just down right mean. While he has been looking for people our age or older, I specifically want to fuck a mature guy, ideally 30-38. My friend found me someone who I actually REALLY want to fuck and he's just kept telling me no. I haven't even met this guy yet, but I've imagined him several times while my boyfriend has fucked me over the past 2 weeks. I actually struggle to orgasm if I'm not thinking about older guys. I've decided that l'm gonna do what I want regardless, because my boyfriend is a being an ass hat. Right now all I've been doing is going behind his back onto reddit messaging men on here. But now I'm about to get mine and I can't wait! I'm actually currently using my vibrator thinking about it as he sleeps in bed next to me now!