Sometimes I miss my ex girlfriend

Sometime I miss the sex with my ex, the sex it was wild, she loves to make me a oral sex and likes to eat my sperm, and this makes me very excited. When I met her I was 18, today I'm 25 and married, i love my wife, but it's not same thing, she don't likes to makes oral sex and don't like to eat. Maybe I'm a weird or sick, but sometimes I want to cheating her with another women; the sex with her it's awesome too, but sometimes I just want try another women's, this makes me sad because I love her and don't want to makes her sad.