i regret picking cs as my major, i should’ve picked a different one

i’m a pathetic loser with a brain of a rotting corpse and i failed 3 classes because of my poor mental health that has been declining and all the stupid decisions i’ve made for the past few years, to make things even worse, i currently have an illness that keeps making me cough constantly, giving me nosebleeds, hiccups for hours and a fever, i feel so weak, i’m willing to kms if i could but it doesn’t seem to be an option thanks to my religious beliefs, is there even any way to make my current situation a little bit better? i’ve always loved playing old visual novels in my free time but even playing them just for a few minutes didn’t seem to change my mental state, i still felt like shit, instead of making me feel better, it made me feel even worse for some reason, can anyone slit my throat already? it has been itching for too long, this is hell…