I dont know what to do

My husband (M28) and I (F27) have been together for around eight years and married for about a year.

He is very unmotivated.

I am in a stressful situation at work — I hate my underpaid job. I have decided to do something about it. I am learning new skills and looking for better jobs. It's a challenging process, as I want to change career but the job market is poor.

I also have family issues: one of my relatives is undergoing difficult surgery this year.

I am a very stressed person and I have an autoimmune condition caused by stress. My last blood test results were poor due to increased stress and cortisol levels.

The problem in my relationship is that I have goals, but my partner doesn't. In fact, he doesn’t work towards any goals at all.

We talked about our income. He earns more than me, but not by much. We agreed that we need to do something about it. I’m constantly looking for jobs and trying to learn new skills. Three months ago, he took a certification course, saying he would start looking for a new job and developing his skills.

However, he stopped doing anything after gaining the certification. He simply hasn't done anything about his job since.

We want to buy an apartment. We have some savings that could help us secure a bank loan. After the wedding, my partner said he would start looking for apartments and do the necessary research. But nothing like this happened. I started searching for apartments and loans alone. He keeps promising that he will start looking next week or next month.

I cannot do it alone.

He acts like a child.

I also told him to go for a medical check-up, as he hasn't had one for two years. He is still shirking all his responsibilities.

I cannot be his mother. I have my own problems to focus on. I can't plan things for him — he doesn't plan anything.

When I asked him what his plans were for the next few years, he said he didn't know.

He is comfortable now. He's not stressed at work. He plays a lot of video games and enjoys his hobbies.

We've had this discussion many times. He went to therapy at one point, which helped a little, but he doesn't go anymore.

I think his lack of ambition is destroying our relationship.

I might be putting pressure on him. I always initiate conversations about it, but not in a nice way, as I'm mostly angry. He promises he will change, but nothing happens.

I don't want to do this anymore. I don't want to be his mother and tell him what to do. I don't want to do his work for him.

I told myself that I would continue to grow in my career and in life without him. My body can't cope with having to drag him along with me.

I feel like we won't buy an apartment unless he's willing to get involved in the process.

I need to solve my problems and continue growing as a person, but if he doesn't want to move forward, we'll end up drifting apart.

What do you think?

TL;DR- my husband (m28) acts like a child and I (f27) cannot do the work for him anymore