Feeling gender envy for my ex

My ex and I broke up about 3 months ago, and now that I'm starting to accept the break up, I realized I feel immense gender envy towards him. I was wondering if anyone could lend advice about getting over gender envy because it is definitely not healthy to think this way.

He is also a trans man and has been on testosterone for 2 years less than me (~3 years). I know it's super dumb and weird to compare someone else's transition to your own, especially someone I was so close to, but it's the pattern I've fallen into.

He has what I call a "effortless masculinity," it's what I've always wanted from my transition, that kind of boyish face with a toned physique, much deeper voice than mine, moves in a very self-assured and masculine way. He's the kind of guy that other men immediately take a liking to and assume is cis. It doesn't help that I'm still very attracted to him.

I know all of this just lies in my own insecurity and that I should be focusing on improving myself. Does anyone have advice on how to stop thinking about others like this?