I’ve been led on for weeks

He (25M) blindsided me (23F) after being together 5 years. We lived together and had just gotten a cat.

He was very avoidant after the breakup. He blamed me for so much and was refusing to talk about anything but logistics. This was so painful for me. It’s like he became a different person overnight. 2 weeks later I moved my stuff out of our apartment and became very depressed. I decided to cut contact since he was so emotionless towards me.

1 month after the breakup he came apologizing for how horribly he ended things and explaining he lost feelings and tried to overcompensate by planning more dates with me to try to get the spark back. And he realized that he should have talked to me about this and said he still felt things for me and if we wanted to get the spark back we could. He also brought up the possibility of couples therapy.

I asked for time to heal from the trauma of the blindside before meeting in person and he was respectful of this. Three weeks later I called him and talked on the phone and he tells me he doesn’t know how he feels anymore. He’s confused and is enjoying being alone.

I went on Instagram a day after the phone call and noticed he had deleted me from every photo burst. This hurt me so much as he specifically told me he’d never delete me from those memories. I messaged him telling him how hurt I was and that he is not considering my feelings at all. We ended up talking on the phone again and he bluntly says he has no romantic interest in me. I started sobbing. It felt like reliving the breakup all over again.

How could he give me hope that we work things out and then act like I’m crazy for thinking so. Him telling me he doesn’t have feelings for me was just the final blow.

He claims he wants to be friends and doesn’t want to lose me but I’m in so much pain. I love him and it’s not fair to me to be on the back burner for him while I watch him live his life without me.