please help, looking for some nice words, really trying my best to recover from depression.

hey guys, ive been pretty severely depressed for the past 3 years now. it is horrible. depression is the worst thing that has ever occurred to me. its incredibly difficult to deal with it but i have been really trying.

for the past two weeks ive actually felt pretty decent! i managed to quit short form content a few months ago and i think it made a huge difference. i feel way better compared to how i used to. i was so close to trying to kill myself. i struggled with self harm. there was so many problems. now i feel okay. once i used to dread looking in the mirror, i would immediately cry. now i think i am quite pretty. im accepting of my looks. i have found hope in my future as i discovered a really big interest in space and science in general, ive always loved space as a kid, but now i came back to it and its the most fascinating ever.

but i feel like im going to get worse again, not horrible, not how it used to be but its really going to bring me down. over the past two days ive noticed i have not been sticking to routines and eating more which is usually the first signs things are going to go downhill. ifs been the same for a year now while trying to get better. i feel good for a week but usually EVEN LESS and then i feel horrible for 2 weeks. then it repeats

but i dont want it to happen again. it brings me down a lot. makes me feel very insecure. so ive wanted to try ro reach out for help. i figured that if i notice the warnings signs now is the best time to prevent it. can anyone please give me some nice words, anything? :(