Leaving to study in the states

Problem/Goal: I need some advice

Context: I (19M) am about to start my sem in the states for first year college. it’s a pre-nursing course that doesn’t guarantee my admission into the nursing program. just to add, I gave up my slot in UST nursing to pursue this. I already have my greencard and SSN at this point and is about to leave again (i came home to visit for Christmas because I was very depressed over there).

Now I am about to return but something aches in my heart. My family and my girlfriend say I can stay which in truth I want. My girlfriend even told me to just study here and get my citizenship later. In truth I hate LDR, and this is breaking me because even my family said that my studies come first and my citizenship second. To add to, the cost of attending is so high that even though we can be called “may kaya” here sa Phil. it would just barely be enough for my school there.

I’m conflicted, scared and honestly doubtful. What if I just stay and pursue leaving at a later date? Focus on myself first, my life and my happiness?