i (m33) came on my neighbors panties while staying in her apartment

years ago my apartment was being renovated, and a neighbor from the same building let me stay in her other place while the work was going on. she didnt really live there, she usually rented it out, but it was empty at the time.

on the first day i went into her bedroom and found some of her clothes there, probably left for when she came on weekends. then i opened a drawer and saw her panties. being alone in her place, surrounded by her stuff, fucked with my head, and i ended up jerking off and cumming on them.

she was like 50, but in a really dirty confident way. i always saw her with younger guys. sometimes i still wonder if she ever noticed what i did.

back then i was too insecure about my size to ever try anything with her. now im more confident (or reckless, maybe a bit broken), and honestly i think i could have fucked her. My dick is still small-average, but i kind of turned that insecurity into a fetish. my nervous system did actually and now keeps chasing the rush... not cause its necessarily pleasurable but cause it's familiar. shame, arousal, fear, being seen, being wanted and being exposed... all at once. yeah kinda broken.