I’m scared of being judged for moving on too fast

I was married for four years. I was never truly happy. He was a mama’s boy, had a gambling addiction, and was manipulative and emotionally abusive. For most of the marriage, I felt small, anxious, and constantly second guessing myself.

A month after we separated, I met someone unexpectedly. He’s five years younger than me, but emotionally mature, communicates clearly and makes me feel seen and respected. For the first time in years, I feel calm instead of walking on eggshells. I laugh more. I feel like myself again. Yes, the chemistry is great, but more importantly, the emotional safety is something I never had before. Almost no one knows about this relationship, just a couple of close friends and my therapist. My family lives across the country, and I haven’t told them yet. I’m terrified of being judged for moving on too fast, even though emotionally, my marriage ended long before the separation did.

Part of me feels guilty, like I’m doing something wrong. Another part of me feels relieved, like I’m finally choosing myself after years of surviving instead of living. I don’t know if healing is supposed to look lonely, or if it’s okay that healing, for me, looks like connection. I don’t know if I’m looking for advice, validation, or just a place to say this out loud. I just needed to get this off my chest.