Why I find John interesting.

He's poor, Long Island white trash, yet he acts like a rich elitist.

He's dumb as dog shit, yet acts like he's Neil deGrasse Tyson.

He's an irrelevant, talentless nobody, yet acts like he's Johnny Carson.

He's a fat, hideous swamp goblin, yet acts like he's Johnny Depp.

He hasn't been laid in years, yet acts like he's Lemmy Kilmister.