Sorry rats, I’m just better

I’ve been playing Arc Raiders for about two months now, and I just discovered the best strategy for keeping my hard-earned loot from those filthy RATS.

I don’t actually own the game, but my wife’s boyfriend has been kind enough to let me play the game on his computer downstairs while they watch TV upstairs since it’s often pretty loud up there when they watch TV.

Now, I’m no good at combat and almost never make it to a place first to loot. I’ve been trying to get better with my trusty Rattler II but even with this god-tier weapon I can’t seem to take anyone or anything out and have to resort to running away.

Last night, my wife’s boyfriend came downstairs and let me log in to his computer to play, and even gave me headphones to wear, saying there was a storm going on and he wanted to make sure I could concentrate (I didn’t hear anything, so I’m assuming he heard something I didn’t. He’s so nice!).

Anyways, with headphones on, I was locked the heck in.

It was in the buried city, and I was looting some buildings in a small cluster of buildings. Out of nowhere, bam! A gunshot whizzed past my head, some dishonorable rat come to take my treasure.

I turned, ran, and slid down a nearby staircase to hide behind a cabinet at the bottom of the stairs, and I could hear footsteps approaching. Without thinking, I did something unimaginable. I opened the closet door, stuffed my loot inside it, and ran.

That awful, disgusting, dishonorable degenerate ended up killing me with his Hairpin, clearly the best weapon in the game. But my loot was safe.

I was amazed at my own genius under pressure.

Before long, I’d taken all the best loot my wife’s boyfriend had (he had a Jupiter, an Equalizer, a couple Aphelions and an Arpeggio he would occasionally let me use if I was good) and tucked them all away into my hiding place in the buried city.

He’s going to be so proud of me when I tell him what I did!