Fear of... starting studying?

Hello

I don't know if this problem is related to OCD, but I need your advice people, especially people who somehow dealt with OCD or had similar problem. So, in the first place I must tell you that I was diagnosed with OCD when I was 13 and now I am in my 20s. I had a bigger gap between high school and university, but I remember that when I was a school student, I was failing some grades because of anxiety and according to that - big urge to comfort myself by for example speaking hours with my best (back then best and only) friend. Later I didn't paid much attention to that, because I was just working some minimal wage job and didn't care much about studying. Also, my biggest problem were obssesive, intrusive thoughts. This is settled for a while, but now - when I started studies at the university in the October previous year - my new-old problem became very visible. I am somehow afraid of.. starting process of studying? I am again failing grades, because I am not able to discipline myself and start process of reading books. I don't know how to describe it. I feel anxiety whenever I have to open a book and start longer reading. When I start, I read for like 20 pages and become demotivated, because I don't feel like... good when reading? I am often pondering and then I realize I didn't paid much attention to what I readed for past half a minute - and then I have to come back. I am quitting reading and start wasting time. Mostly playing computer games, so I thought in the beginning that detox from gaming will help me. It is not the case I think, because when I uninstalled all games from computer and detoxed for few days, I still couldn't force myself to reading. Instead of gaming, I was for example taking a nap or just wasting time by doing my most common compulssion - writing endless to do lists (it is somehow relaxing for me, it gives the illusion of being organized). I don't know what to do, I am afraid I will fail these studies. I asked my university's Office for Persons with Disabilities for psychological help, but first exams are on the horizon and I still have to wait for their consultations. Please, give me some advice guys.

Also, I want to mention, that I don't have this problem with doing assignments. Especially these on the computer, like making presentations or tests online. It is easy for me and I am very disciplined with such tasks. Thanks for your help and time sacrificed for me.