I am checking myself into a mental health facility

I’m not doing well, and am having intense suicide tendencies. Along with having overlapping symptoms that could be a personality disorder like BPD or OCPD but I can also be part of my autism and PTSD.

I’m gonna be going in on Friday because I have an appointment move of my therapist on Wednesday to discuss just what I should do or expect…

i’m pretty nervous about it, and I’m gonna make myself go to the cafeteria first just to get a bite to eat and maybe like a soda just so that I have something to. I guess around me if that makes sense?

Also, I don’t know I have a couple questions am I able to order food in a medical facility like this? I have a free entrée coupon for QDOBA, and I’m pretty sure that it’s gonna be OK there. It’s just that kind of have a rule about buying myself food for delivery or treating myself on holidays.

Second question, I need to sleep with a fan I have one at home. It’s small and portable. I just don’t know if they’d let me bring it due to safety reasons. My suicidal thoughts are actually not hurting myself physically but using helium gas to kill myself that way. I hate physical pain, I’m already in pain, almost 24/7 due to my disability.

I don’t want to miss and miss shoot myself on accident on my jaw instead of at my brain stem…