A stream-of-consciousness piece about feeling outside reality and self

I feel as though I exist outside the familiar, as if I am inside a circular loop that keeps turning me within it, and I no longer know where I am.

With every turn, there is a world that feels unfamiliar.

I feel as though I am traveling, as though I am working, as though I am within a family gathering.

Where am I? And when? I do not know.

I live inside a vortex that presses and constricts me, and I feel a loss of my sense of reality—yet at the same time, I am in control of my reality, living moment by moment.

So I am myself, and I am not myself.

Rather, I am myself—myself—myself.

And I am he; I am myself in that moment, and in every moment as an “I.”

I am in control of my life, and I live for what I pursue and what I desire in life.

And then unfamiliar things arrive.

Does the mind sway from its place until it touches a different world?

Do I consume, or am I being consumed?

Consumed by myself—so the outcome becomes an outcome of me.

"This is a translated personal text (not asking for diagnosis). I'm sharing it as an existential/poetic reflection and I'd like your interpretations."