A Romantasy but for a Guy - Chapter 1: The Bellows

Satire

Chad looked at the tracks with the instincts of a hunter four times his age. It had to be this way. Chad had grown up without a father, with a well meaning but naive mother, and with three wet brained older brothers whose only talents were inexplainable poor dice luck.

It was fifteen years ago when Chad first ventured into the Bellows. Xaden, the youngest of his brothers had gotten a nasty cut on just foot from a zebra muscle in the river. The bill from the local healer had drained what little money their mother had scraped together for food that week.

Hunting anywhere else in their barony required tags. Tags that a six year old lad could not purchase even if he had money. Unwilling to let his family starve, Chad strung his bow and went into what many referred to as The Cursed Forest.

When Chad thinks back to that faithful day, the day a six year old became a man so his family could eat, he feels no pride only resentment. He fell a deer in only a few hours. It was bigger than he was and he had to make a crude sled to lug it back to their tiny cabin at the edge of town.

And such was his life since. Hunting to provide for his mother and brothers (sometimes trapping or fishing too). Around his tenth birthday is when Chad’s mother stoped picking up odd jobs around town. He had assumed it was because Clairmont, his eldest brother, had come of age and would be finding steady work. Perhaps this is what his mother told herself too. The reality was (and remains) that it was because Chad had proven that he could hunt, trap, and fish better than anyone in town and that he was willing to go to the Bellows where he could do it legally.

Chad was not sure why he was so good at these things. Just kidding, Chad was not introspective, he figured it’s because he is the fucking man, always has been always will be. Manliest man dude ever.

Chad chuckled at himself 'heh dude kind of sounds like doo doo if you think about it'. Chad looked down at the tracks again and concluded it was a female boar and its shoat less than 20 minutes old based on the amount of snow that had landed on top of them. With any luck he could down the mother and trap the shoat. The shoat could be sold to one of the witch ladies for 5 silver. Enough to keep Rhysand, the second oldest and most gambling addicted of his brothers, occupied for at least 2 weeks.

He continued to follow the tracks with practiced stealth. His focus only wavered for a moment when he realized he'd never seen this part of the Bellows before. Odd, it had been at least four years since his travels stretched him further into the Bellows. He steadied his mind knowing that stray thoughts were an archers undoing. He was close.

In time Chad would realize that in his 21 years this was his first mistake.

*To Be Continued (Maybe)*

Posted Jan 22, 2026, 11:21 AM UTC

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