Feeling really isolated and rejected, don’t know what to do, no community.

I f(23) had never had any stable friendships or relationships in my life, people either use me, turn on me, or replace me. I have never been enough for anyone in my life including my previous parents or family (I’m practically an orphan). The closest thing I get to in stability is relationships but those fizzle out within a year or less, I get told I’m attractive, I’m nice, I’m all these things but I still get left behind whether it’s ghosted or just straight up abused. Someone who wanted to be my girlfriend after 4 days, stayed at my house for 2wks, then left & blocked while I was gone because I asked her to come with me to charge my car (like she said she would the day before) but she didn’t want to because she wanted to sleep in (it was 3:40PM, she’s done this everyday nor does she have a job, all she wanted to do was have sex, eat, drink, & play games.) literally YESTERDAY, I was gassed about my looks then ghosted by another girl. I have yet to be told I’m unattractive in any capacity, ANY, but this happens frequently. (Not the girl staying at my house, this has never happened before lol). It’s been like this my whole life with Friends or dating. Flashback to high school when all my friends knew I was suicidal and one day they thought I told a mutual friend to d*e then all over a sudden they started paying attention to me only ask why I did that when I never did. Having a girlfriend was the closest connection I was able to ever possibly get because other people would use me or wait until their preferred people would come around. Now it’s getting harder to get a gf because everyone swipes on me before even talking to me. I’m literally so miserable and I don’t understand. If I’m so attractive and no one is talking to me yet then why is this happening to me.