Please feedback I’m a beginner writer and I’ve recently rewritten my chapters after getting a lot of feedback about pacing and structure.

Chapter 14

Tristan crawled out of the broken airship, metal still creaking behind him as smoke drifted into the trees. His arms shook as he pulled himself free. Every breath burned. His vision swam, but instinct forced him upright. Footsteps.Too many.
Voices cut through the forest.
There caught that fellow!
Tristan didn’t wait to see them. He turned and ran. Pain flared through his body as he pushed forward, lungs screaming for air. His boots slipped on damp soil, branches snapping against his face and arms as he crashed through the undergrowth. Behind him, the sound of pursuit grew louder boots hitting earth, armor clinking, breathing steady and controlled.
Gunfire cracked.
Shots tore through bark just inches from his head.
Then a voice rose above the chaos. Calm. Clear.
Trey said “Don’t fire, I want him alive.”
That was worse than the bullets.
Tristan ducked low, sliding beneath a tangle of thick branches. His shoulder slammed into the ground, but he rolled through it and scrambled forward. As he rose, a soldier burst out from between the trees ahead of him, rifle already lifting.
Too close.
Tristan dropped instantly, bending low and slipping past the soldier’s reach.
Something massive leapt.
A blur of muscle and fur exploded from the side of the forest. The lion hit the soldier mid-motion, knocking him off his feet. The scream barely lasted a second before claws and teeth ended it.
Tristan froze.
The lion turned, eyes locking onto him.
A gunshot rang out.
The lion collapsed in the dirt, its body skidding to a stop as blood soaked into the leaves.
Tristan looked back.
Trey stood between the trees, gun still raised, smoke curling from the barrel. His gaze met Tristan’s. There was no anger in it. Only patience.

Run.

Tristan bolted again.
He reached a tree and climbed without thinking, fingers slipping on rough bark as he hauled himself upward. A branch snapped beneath his weight. He lost balance, crashed through leaves—and fell.
The ground vanished.
He rolled down a slope, hitting dirt, roots, stone until he slammed hard at the bottom and skidded to a stop.
Water roared nearby.
Tristan pushed himself up, dizzy, heart hammering, and staggered toward the sound.
The forest opened.
A river cut through the land, wide and violent, dark water rushing fast enough to pull anything under. Mist rose from its surface. The current twisted and surged, dragging branches and debris along with it.
And there stretching across the river
A narrow wooden bridge.
Old. Crooked. Ropes frayed. Planks cracked.
It swayed slightly in the wind.
Tristan stared at it, chest heaving.
If I cross that… I can reach the other village.
Behind him, the forest rustled.
Footsteps spread out.
They were closing in.
Tristan stepped toward the bridge.

—End of Chapter—

Chapter 15

Tristan looked back once.
Trey stood at the edge of the forest. His soldiers were spreading out behind him, firing without stopping. Leaves and bark exploded around Tristan as bullets tore through the trees. Trey’s voice rose above the noise, clear and sharp.
“Where do you think you’re going, alien?” he shouted, laughing.
“This is my planet. You can’t hide from me.”
More shots followed. One hit close enough that wood splintered into Tristan’s face.
They were getting closer.
Ahead of him, the bridge swayed over the river. It was old and narrow, made of cracked planks and thin ropes. The water below rushed fast and dark, slamming into rocks and pulling everything downstream. The bridge looked like it could break at any moment.
Tristan stopped for just a second.
If he stayed, he would die.
He stepped onto the bridge.
At first, he moved slowly, forcing his legs to obey him. The bridge creaked under his weight. The ropes pulled tight, shaking hard. He sped up, then slowed again when the bridge swayed too much. Below him, the water twisted violently.
A gunshot rang out.
Pain exploded through his ankle.
Tristan cried out as his foot slipped. His body slammed into the railing and slid through the gap. For a moment, he was falling.
Then his hands caught the edge.
His shoulder screamed as his full weight yanked him down. He struggled to hold on and looked below.
The river burst upward.
A crocodile jumped from the water, its jaws snapping shut just below his leg. Another followed. Water splashed everywhere as large bodies collided beneath him.
“Era !” Tristan gasped, pulling himself higher with shaking arms.
Behind him, footsteps reached the bridge.
Trey stepped onto it, calm and steady, as if nothing was wrong.
“Go,” Trey said quietly.
“Get him.”
Two soldiers rushed forward.
They barely took three steps.
The river exploded again.
Two crocodiles launched upward and slammed into the soldiers. One was dragged under the water screaming. The other was caught around the waist and pulled down before he could react. Blood spread across the surface.
Trey cursed and fired.
The first shot missed.
The second killed one crocodile.
But the river didn’t calm. More shapes moved beneath the surface. Eyes appeared. Teeth. Too many bodies.
Even Trey stepped back.
Tristan didn’t waste the chance.
He pulled himself onto the bridge, dragging his injured leg behind him. Blood poured from his ankle and dropped into the river. The crocodiles reacted instantly, crashing into each other below.
He crawled forward.
Slowly.
Plank by plank.
Every movement hurt, but he kept going. Stopping meant death.
Gunfire continued behind him. Trey was shooting nonstop. Crocodiles died, but more kept coming.
Too many.
Finally, Tristan reached the other side.
He rolled onto the ground and lay there for a moment, gasping for air. Then he forced himself up and moved forward.
The forest ahead was darker. Thicker. The air felt wrong.
As soon as he entered it, the sounds changed.
Birds screamed from above. Something large moved deep within the trees. A low roar echoed through the forest, deep and heavy.
Behind him, gunfire still echoed.
Trey kept killing.
Trey wasn’t human.
No human fought like that.
Tristan limped deeper into the forest. Branches scratched his skin as shadows closed around him. Every step took him farther from the river—and closer to something unknown.
The forest swallowed him.
Behind him, Trey laughed.
“Run,” Trey called.
“I’ll find you.”

— End of Chapter —

Chapter 16

Tristan moved slowly into the darker part of the forest, dragging his injured leg behind him. Each step sent pain up his body, but he didn’t stop. He couldn’t. The trees were closer here, their trunks thick and crooked, blocking most of the light. A strange sound echoed through the woods—low, distant, like a whisper mixed with a growl.
The gunfire behind him stopped.
Silence followed.
Tristan froze. His breathing grew uneven as he listened. No shots. No footsteps. Only the forest. For a moment, he thought it was over.
Trey…
Did the crocodiles get him?
A tree nearby shook.
Tristan turned his head slowly. Another tree trembled, its branches moving even though there was no wind. The sound came again—closer this time. His chest tightened.
Something was coming.
The ground vibrated slightly. Tristan’s eyes widened as a massive shape shifted between the trees. A tall, twisted trunk moved unnaturally, rotating as if it were searching. Branches scraped against one another, producing a sound like cracking bones.
Tristan screamed.
He dropped to the ground and crawled beneath a cluster of thick roots, pressing his body into the dirt. His breathing was loud. Too loud. He covered his mouth, forcing himself to slow down.
One breath.
Then another.
The forest went quiet.
The shaking stopped.
Tristan waited. His muscles burned, his injured leg trembling. Seconds passed. Nothing happened.
Slowly, he pushed himself up and looked around.
Cold metal pressed against his head.
“Boo.”
Tristan’s face drained of color.
Trey stood behind him, gun resting against his skull, smiling like he had been enjoying the hunt the entire time.
“I caught you,” Trey said calmly. “Thought you could run from me? Alien trash trying to escape my planet.”
Tristan didn’t answer. His hands shook.
Trey laughed softly. “You really thought the forest would save you?”
The forest moved.
A massive branch snapped downward, wrapping around Trey’s torso and yanking him into the air. Trey screamed as his gun slipped from his hand and hit the ground near Tristan.
“WHAT THE—!”
The tree lifted Trey higher, branches tightening around him. Tristan scrambled backward and hid beneath the roots again, heart pounding.
The tree bent forward.
Its bark twisted and split, forming a crude, hollow face. Dark openings shaped like eyes stared directly at Tristan. The trunk leaned closer, close enough that he could feel the air shift.
Tristan screamed and crawled deeper under the roots, barely squeezing through. Branches slammed down around him, missing him by inches.
Then the pressure stopped.
The tree straightened.
Its head slowly rose back into place.
Tristan didn’t wait.
He pushed himself up and ran, limping badly, using the trees for cover. He moved as quietly as he could, holding his breath, forcing his body forward despite the pain.
He thought he was clear.
Then his injured leg brushed against something.
A branch snapped shut around his ankle.
Tristan cried out as he was yanked backward, slamming into the ground. He clawed at the dirt and grabbed the thick root of another tree with both hands.
“No—NO!”
The pull was relentless.
The root tore free.
The tree dragged Tristan along with the uprooted tree, lifting him higher and higher. His screams echoed through the forest as he rose nearly seventy feet into the air.
The trunk split open.
A massive mouth opened beneath him.
Dark. Endless.
Tristan fell.

—End the Chapter—