AITAH for hating my dad?

I know how it sounds, so let me explain. For context, I am a 14 year old girl with Muslim desi parents. Last year, he broke my phone. I was on it too much, apparently. I had just gotten a new phone and I wanted to spend time on it. I was really excited. He didn't like the fact that I wasn't doing my schoolwork. But I tend to finish it in school. I think he had given me 'warnings' or something to get off it and that he would break my phone? but that's all I remember. I thought he was joking. That he wasn't serious. That he wouldn't do it. He came into my room, saw me on my phone and he broke it. He broke it with his hands and threw it on the floor. It was shattered and bent in half. In a way that it wasn't usable. He threw it to the floor hard. All my charms and stickers came out of the case. I think it's pretty stupid to do that, waste your own money. He could've just taken my phone away. He never apologized. He said he had given me a warning. My brother made fun of my phone breaking (not my dad breaking my phone, he's too much of a suck-up to do that). Our relationship hasn't been the same after that. Thinking about it now, a grown man having a tantrum is funny. What do you mean you're too emotionally immature to handle your own anger? My Mom is living abroad. She has been for the past 6 years. We visit sometimes, but she works as a doctor and even when she's here her time is taken up by shifts. She is exhausted after them and tends to sleep. My dad is trying to force me to be a doctor. He tried forcing me to drop art. Only after going 'behind his back' (his words, not mine) did I finally get to do art and not physics. But he still wants me to be a doctor. Ironic considering the fact that he isn't even a doctor. He's a retired engineer. Some more instances where his anger was shown is when my mom came to visit us. It was the day she was leaving. I wanted to talk to her by myself. The family was in the room, but the conversation tends to be around medicine and things I don't understand and I am never included at all so I don't really like it. My dad didn't like the fact that I wasn't sitting with the family. He kept calling my name and you know when your parents get that angry voice? Well he got that. Then he came out of the room (I was waiting outside) and he was walking really angrily. I don't know how to explain it. But the fear I felt when he walked past me was insane. It's hard to describe but I was terrified. I really thought he would hit me. I don't know why. Instead he walked past quickly (like an angry stride), and took my phone and laptop. A few days ago when I didn't come downstairs for breakfast quickly enough he threatened to slap me. Anyway, he wants me to be a doctor because it is a stable career. I told him I was starting a club. He doesn't know what my hobbies are or anything. He said it should be a medical society and that my brother started one. He didn't care to ask what I wanted. Didn't care to ask what I liked. There are some things that have been happening with my brother (the one who made fun of my broken phone). He took the broken phone, dipped it into toilet water whilst I was there and thought it was funny. I think like a year ago now he got into an argument with one of his flatmates and threatened to choke him. Police were called, it was a really big thing and I wouldn't know any of this if it wasn't for my mom. Nobody tells me anything. My brother (let's call him S) doesn't tell me anything. I'm not sure if it's that he doesn't care or is trying to protect me from the truth but I have a right to know. He didn't tell me parents about his alcohol either. Apparently he's been drinking since his second year of university but a year ago he got a really bad addiction and ran to my dad for help. He only comes when he needs help, otherwise he doesn't come home at all. Anyway, he started stealing money to buy it and was generally a mess. My dad kept him still like a stray. Eventually he got better but to be honest I still don't feel safe around him. And I overheard my parents talking about him or more so his addiction. My mom said something like this, "We should be glad it was only alcohol. Imagine if he left Islam or were LGBT. They would say we are in the wrong." My dad agreed with her. They think an alcohol addiction is better than being those things. I'm an atheist and I'm pretty sure I'm bi, so now thinking about it and hearing those things hurt even more. I can't guarantee my safety if I told them the truth. Whenever I'm around my dad thoughts of hatred come into my head. I got no education on my period whatsoever or on sex. No education on how to brush my teeth. I started wearing the hijab to copy my mom. I was happy at the time and understood generally nothing of the religion except that I have to pray. They didn't teach me that either. Now whenever I take it off on holiday, my dad makes small comments like, "A person looks more elegant with the scarf." My mom says it's my choice. She says that my job is my choice. I tried telling her about how dad is forcing me to take art. She said, "I liked art when I was at school." She just changed the subject. I left after that. It hurts because my mom wanted to be a actor, but her dad forced her to be a doctor. And I know my grandparents were not nice and were really strict, I remember my mom mentioning once in a conversation that she and her mother (my grandma) were scared of him. She said it like it was normal. Since my grandparents and extended family like abroad I only got to see my grandparents like 2 times before both of my grandfathers died. Also, when I was around 8 or 9 I asked my mom what lesbian was. It was from gacha studios, I saw it on a video. I was banned from gacha after that. 2d characters. I remember seeing videos like that and thinking it was wrong. I remember feeling guilty for watching them. I remember feeling ashamed of my period. I remember not wanting to tell my dad about it or tell him to buy me pads. I would text him it instead just so that I didn't have to say. The misogyny too is crazy. My mom, a woman herself, saw someone driving badly and was like "It must be a woman". It wasn't. It was a man driving the car. I remember my friend in Pakistan, she was the maid and was 15 or 16, she got married off. I remember being told to not keep my legs open. My grandma told me that my male relatives won't say anything but they are all thinking about it. I remember my dad making me cook and help him. When I mentioned one of my brothers who doesn't know how to cook, he said that he will get married and his wife will make food for him but I will have to make food for my family. Also I struggled with really bad mental health almost two years ago. There was a bully and her friends, I won't get too much into it but they made sure to make all the girls in the class exclude me, talk about me whilst I was right there, and treat me like absolute dirt. And they would make faces when I walk into the room and whisper and laugh whilst looking directly at me. Having no friends didn't help my self esteem. I was at a really dark place and was suicidal. I didn't get any education on that either, but I wanted to kill myself. Killing yourself is haram. I felt guilty. I never told my parents. Mental health isn't real in their eyes. I might have actually done it if I had more knowledge. I'm a lot better now and have actual friends, but the fact that I didn't feel comfortable telling them says everything. There is something else I haven't told them. Apart from my beliefs (or lack of). I was around 10. I had been seeing videos of those text to speech stories (IFYKYK) and they were doing face reveals. Keep in mind, I was young, stupid, and really emotionally immature at the time. I was just a kid. Well, I saw these videos and decided to ask my roblox friends for a face reveal. I added one of my friends on snapchat and the other on discord. Long story short, a couple of months in and I realized it was wrong. So I decided to tell my brothers. One of them said, "What is wrong with you?" In a really angry voice. The other got the other girl's discord and idk what he said to her but we didn't text after that. I didn't tell them about the snapchat but I deleted it myself. They gave me unlimited access to the internet and no education on that either. Well done, parents! But honestly it could have gone a lot worse. Atleast they were both kids. Anyway, let me know what you think. Am I the asshole for hating him? Thank you for reading :) Fyi I'm a lot better now mentally ^^