I’m asexual and I’m so lonely

That’s it, basically. I don’t have people to talk about this irl since I’m not out to my friends or family, so I wanted to vent. Asexuality is probably the most lonely orientation there is. I do feel romantic attraction, and I want your typical relationship, just without the bedroom stuff.

I have a rich social life, my own place, nice hobbies and a job I like. But I’m getting closer to 30 and I’m the only single person in my social circle. Seeing people get married and settle down is painful when that’s what I want but haven’t been able to find.

Before I fully accepted my sexuality it was pretty easy for me to get dates, and I know if I wasn’t ace I probably would have a partner by now. My only attempts at relationships have ended because of it, and that has driven me away from mainstream dating apps.

I’ve tried the few ace dating sites there are, but they’re pretty dead because we’re such a small minority. Not to mention I live in a small country with no ace community whatsoever.

People keep telling me to just get pets and spend more time with my friends, and those things are great, but they just are not the same thing.

I’ve been trying to accept the fact I just might be single all my life, but I’m not at that point mentally yet. So I’m just sad instead. Not all the time obviously, it's not something I sulk over 24/7, but every time I'm reminded of my situation, the sadness comes in waves.

Vent over, I guess.