Music reminds me of you

I put on the song I promised myself I’d never listen to. I see that pic of you with him, I bet you feel so much happier now. I’m not even a consideration anyone am I? Just a horror story you maybe tell sometimes. To me you were so much more than you know. Nothing has filled the void you left, when you went. I had a dream where I was begging you to stay with me, begging you to listen to me. You told me that I’d figure it out, that you know I’ll be okay. I’m not okay, not in the slightest. I spend my days trying to distract myself from this deep depression and loneliness. Would you still be able to see my pain through my eyes?

I don’t know why, but one of the things I desire the most from you is for you to sing to me. I just miss your voice and laughter. I just know if I could have you for even a moment, I’d just cry and cry in your arms. One billion things racing through my mind, not never the words to express myself to you. I was once your favourite person, and I couldn’t help but feel so happy with that. In that moment, once in my life I was loved for who I was, despite my flaws. To you I didn’t have any, I was perfect. How I’m terrified by how you will remember me. If you speak of me, please be kind.

I have never seen someone with any prettier lips than yours. You’d be insecure of your hair, but I couldn’t help but fantasise about how I’d want to play with it. You were so determined to teach me how to farm, but I can’t even grow as a person. I had all these plans of things I wanted to gift you, things I wanted to do with you. How can I move on when even the smallest things remind me of you. I’m slowly burning away, yet I feel so cold. Prior to us, I’d rarely cry. Now I rarely cry over anything else but you. You tried to curse me with the memory of you, and you have succeeded in that Luna.